The ways in which the columns are presented could be improved the sizes seem to be a bit too long and could be shortened to ensure that the targeted audience are keen to read more. Additionally there's a lot of white spaces that could be filled and subheadings added to separate each point. But I liked the way you've tried to stick to the targeted audience by using high vocabulary and statistics.
A very detailed and thoroughly researched piece, with evidence of some really hard work. Well done. You've got lots of information which you use to back up your ideas, following a clear structure. You need to check some of your facts- the income model for YouTube is very complex and it is actually very difficult to make a living from just putting videos on YouTube. In terms of layout, you have followed some conventions such as using columns and images, although these images could have been livelier. Also be careful of empty space. But a good first attempt at Desk Top Publishing. Vanessa
The ways in which the columns are presented could be improved the sizes seem to be a bit too long and could be shortened to ensure that the targeted audience are keen to read more. Additionally there's a lot of white spaces that could be filled and subheadings added to separate each point. But I liked the way you've tried to stick to the targeted audience by using high vocabulary and statistics.
ReplyDeleteA very detailed and thoroughly researched piece, with evidence of some really hard work. Well done. You've got lots of information which you use to back up your ideas, following a clear structure. You need to check some of your facts- the income model for YouTube is very complex and it is actually very difficult to make a living from just putting videos on YouTube. In terms of layout, you have followed some conventions such as using columns and images, although these images could have been livelier. Also be careful of empty space. But a good first attempt at Desk Top Publishing. Vanessa
ReplyDelete